I’ve been drinking way too much. Some claim an alcoholic is someone who binge drinks more than five times a month. That’s been an average week for me this past month.
The naysayers will quickly chime in, “why are you writing about how to go out sober then?” Because I finally figured out how to do it – properly.
See, I realized I was having some issues with the sauce last week. So instead of buying bottles at the club. I decided to pop a few Red Monkey and see how the night went.
I’m sick of having hangovers. I don’t have any desire to blow dough on bottles every weekend like the hedonist I’d become. But I still wanted to go out. I still wanted to hang out with the boys. Hell, I certainly wanted to mack a lil’ bit, too. Straight lava flow.
The Problem with Going Out Sober
I’d tried this before. My life is one of revolving addictions. Booze gets in the way of some while aiding and abetting others. But I’ve always knew that too much sauce can get in the way of productivity.
So I’ve stopped drinking for months on end before. But I never made much of an effort to go out or be social during these periods. I just wasn’t interested. I was focused on other things.
Plus, going out sober can be a drag. I’d tried it before. Dealing with drunken morons while not in a drunken moronic state of mind can be quite annoying. After 4-5 times going out sober and not having much fun, I pretty much gave up on the endeavor.
How to Go Out Sober
That was until last week. That was until I decided to give up drinking for five straight weeks. And I’m not sure I’ll ever go back. One day maybe, but for now – I plan to stay off the sauce for a bit.
Ready to learn how to go out sober and not hate everything about it? Great. Here’s what I do:
Eat a big meal around 5:30-7:30. This will set the base for your evening. You need to have great energy, so try and eat something healthy, but with a few extra carbs. I’ve found sushi works well.
Wait two hours after your last bite. If you finish eating at 7 PM, then wait until 9 or 9:30 PM. Then take 3-4 Red Monkey pills.
Relax for an hour and listen to some music or chill with friends. Red Monkey takes 1-2 hours to kick in.
After an hour or more, drink a big cup of strong coffee. Caffeine mixes well with Red Monkey. I’ve found Red Coffee is ideal. I like to add a tablespoon of coconut oil, too.
Head to the party, bar, or club around 1:30 hours after you’ve consumed Red Monkey.
Try to be with friends when you begin going out sober. Going out sober and alone is a whole different level. If you’re with friends, you should start to get into a great social mood around the two-hour mark post-consumption.
You should start to feel in a social flow state before the three-hour mark on Red Monkey.
If not, there are a few things you can do. First, take five huge breathes and down a bottle of water. This is basic. However, the next item is a bit odd. If you find yourself still in your head and not enjoying people, try slapping your thighs 5-10 times. Do it hard. Imagine yourself as a warrior preparing for battle. Slap the shit out of your thighs. You should feel a spark of energy after doing this. You should feel a smile creep across your face. After ten thigh slaps, I’m almost always in a better mood and ready to socialize.
Enjoy your evening after this! Talk, dance, flirt, and have fun.
Then go home and get to bed between 3-4 AM. I hate staying out late and I’ve found Red Monkey starts to wear off around 4 AM on the schedule above. So I never stay out past then.
Sleep! I sleep like a baby after going out sober and taking Red Monkey. You will, too. Just make sure you have at least eight hours the morning after. If you take this smart drug and go to bed at 3 AM, don’t set your alarm before 11 AM – if possible.
Going Out Sober – My Experiences
I’ve only used the above protocol twice thus far. But both nights I’ve had an amazing time and woke up feeling refreshed and energized the next day. No hangover. No wasted days laying in bed on What’s App chatting because I have no energy to do anything else.
I “partied” with my friends. We hit the club, bonded together, spit some game to some gals, danced, and had fun. They were drunk. I wasn’t. But no one knew because I was social and talking to everyone.
Don’t go out sober if you’re going to be the shy guy standing in the corner with a scowl. I’ve done it, and it blows. But the combination of the protocol above and Red Monkey changed all that – in only one weeks time.
Now I go out sober and have more fun than most. I talk with more people, make more friends, and dance when I feel like it. It’s a great time.
Red Monkey Pro-Tip
You should only use this smart drug once or twice a week. Using Red Monkey more than 7-8 times a week is not something you want to do.
However, sometimes going out on Friday and Saturday is fun. If you want to go out back to back nights, then take three Red Monkey the first night with one cup of coffee an hours or two later.
On the second night (usually Saturday), take four Red Monkey. Then drink 1.5 cups of coffee an hour or two later.
This cycle will ensure you reap the social benefits of this smart drug both nights you go out.
How to Go Out Sober
You can, too! You can start going out sober without worry. You’ll have just as much fun, while still being able to function the next day. Productivity and a social life can go hand-in-hand. Grab a bottle of Red Monkey and find out for yourself.
Travel junkie turned blogger. Location independent. From the Midwest, but often based in Latin America. Big on beaches, rumba, and rum. Addicted to the gym. Committed to showing a different style of travel - one that involves actually interacting with locals and exploring different cultures.